Thursday 14 March 2013

Les Poems, Of Bongs and Slaves

YOLO peeps! Though I do have a much much longer life span than each of you. But hey! You gotta live when you gotta live.

I don't even know why I said something that unfunny. 
Holy shit! 'Unfunny' is an actual word! Go figure.

So I don't have the origin story up yet BECAUSE it happened so long ago. And FINE! my white and grey cells do outnumber the quantity you have. (Actually, they don't. We have red, blue and yellow cells for memory, intelligence and beauty respectively. They're much brighter colors and break the usual white and grey standard, see? We are so much more fun than the humans even from the inside.) Anyway, so I just want everything to be true and not exaggerated. You get what I mean? I just wanna help you all to know and understand perfectly, the beginning of life on earth for an alien.

Okay fine! I have exams next week. I don't get the time to write. Go ahead and judge me!

Anyway, here's this week's le poèm läme
(In the cool music part, just imagine the coolest rap music playing in the background. Okay?)


So you thought I was going to write..
This is Woo-Hooing.
And you had a breakfast lite..
Well, sorry to disappoint you..
I was busy making my sims WooHoo!

---Cool Music---

So, I searched for my pencil
And I searched for my pen
Forgetting that the hens had gone to the den..
I wondered and wondered what the heck was wrong..
I know this is a duck. A bishounen duck.
But I couldn't find a cooler hen!
Then I remembered I was friends with a Bong!

So I guess everything makes sense.
She is afraid of getting an eye lens..
This poem is gonna send her to the moon..
Out of her house, out of her cocoon!

As lame as this poem might be...
Who cares? I'm just being Despicable Me.
I gotta train my dragon and be Brave.
Excuse me now, I gotta attend to my slave.


P.S. Bong and Slave, I hope you feel bad after reading this poem and commit suicide. For you. xoxo.

P.P.S. If you actually commit suicide, I will totally judge you cuz this poem doesn't even insult you.

P.P.P.S. This poem does not intend to hurt any other Bongs or Slaves. It refers to my 'friends' who I call Bong and Slave. :D

11 comments:

  1. well, didn't find it offensive the second time as well. love your blog :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha. Don't worry. I'll offend you someday :P
      Thanks :D

      Delete
  2. Hahaha! This is really funny!
    You are cooler than Jadoo, babe. :*

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks haha :-D
      Feels so much better now that you've said that. That stupid, fake alien. Urghh.

      Delete
  3. Your 'About Me' reminds me of this other blogger - who is a Bong by the way (so am I and no offense taken).
    This guy: http://sarcasti-nation.blogspot.in/

    Too much use of 'X' to stand out and look cool and you're clearly 12 years old. I'm just judging you, don't take it personally. Ok, take it personally, but don't bother me about it, ok? I have some Woo-Hooing to do.

    P.S: Check IndiB review section.

    P.P.S: Given how cool you are, I have no doubt that you'll get what IndiB is. Leaving words half-spelt is coo'.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Is replying to a comment considered bothering? Well, my apologies if it is.

      I can't afford to take this comment personally because you seem to be prejudiced against this blog because of me being 'from Delhi' and your assumption that I'm 'clearly 12 years old.'

      P.S. I'm humbled that you think I'm coo'. Thanks a lot.

      P.P.S. That's the first time I've seen that word being written that way on Earth.

      Delete
  4. Nope, this post is a part of my 'Weekly Lame Poems' run.

    It explains that I could not write not write my 'Origin Story' due to my exams




    Which are still on :'(


    Thanks for reading and the comment :-D

    ReplyDelete
  5. I think I am too high....this poem and the hen have taken me to a trance like state or maybe I was already there.
    I dont know....what did I just read!!

    Remain the alien you!!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Let's all get high together human! :D

      Your blog posts are high on humor, so I guess you were already high! ;)

      Thanks for reading and the comment. :)

      Delete

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